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(Alternate title: “One Girl's desperate attempt to change the subject.”)
I am soooo over BaconGate 2011. Eagerly awaiting Sausage Fest 2012.
No. No, that's not right at all. Pretend I didn't say that.
Yesterday's clustertruck of pro-piggy posts sent me into a crazed mental spiral. I had to go to my happy place. Where some folks enjoy crosswords and Sudoku, I enjoy word associations – inspired by the fact that I have one talent, and one talent only: I am really good at saying, thinking, and typing words. Sometimes I like to allow these words to flow nonsensically, just to see where I end up. (This is called “Blogging.”)
I kid. But I did indulge in a little word game yesterday. This game (set against the backdrop of BBC World News) went a little like this:
British Bacon: “Rashers.”
British Sausage: “Bangers.”
British Breakfast: “Bangers & Mash.”
Sounds like: “Franklin & Bash.” (Apparently a new show featuring Zach Morris…and that guy from Clueless?)
And that's where I stopped, because…have you SEEN how hot Zach Morris is these days? I mean, the man is nearly 40 and he still looks like a beautiful slab of man meat. No wonder he keeps getting acting jobs. (I know, I'm not supposed to be watching television. And I really don't, save Parks & Rec and Vampire Fiction Real Housewives The Discovery Channel.) But seriously, he's aged quite well:
I agree, Mr. Morris. Two thumbs up to that handsome coiff you've cultivated since your Bayside days.
Now, I'm less sure about Travis Birkenstock. He must be married to somebody very, very important.
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